Thursday, 14 October 2010

The significance of socks.

Tremendous party last night and got the grand total of 3 hours sleep before having to roll out of bed and into the shower thanks to the joy of morning lectures! Had a wonderful chat about graphic novel film adaptations with a friend of mine. He agreed with me that 'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' films sucked but I was surprised that he liked the film version of 'Watchmen'. He claimed to prefer the ending to the film over that of the book and thought the film was a fine portrayal. I have not yet seen the film but loved the book so much that so far I have avoided it.

Sadly I did not avoid Wall Street 2 which I saw last weekend with Germanicus. It was totally my fault as I suggested it (we watched the first one together and I loved Gordon Gekko). It turned out to be very long indeed, had no plot, no likeable or believable characters and was dull beyond all sense or belief! But strangely I loved every minute of it because G's arm was across me with his hand resting on my knee (not holding it but resting on it). He sort of just put his arm across me when we sat down (holding hands in the cinema was always what we did) and I wanted him to keep it there too much to tell him not to. Feeling the lovely weight of his arm and loving being so close to him I almost burst into tears several times but this time I didn't but just let myself enjoy it and being there with him.

We went for thai food after the film (pad thai being one of my favourite dishes) and I stupidly got upset and had to excuse myself and run to the loo. It was all to do with his socks... For his last birthday I bought him very expensive beautiful designer socks which he loved. Every time since I have seen him since we split up I have at some point gently asked what socks he was wearing (lovely colourful ones is the answer) and never has it been one of the three pairs I got him. It has become some sort of symbol now and I got upset when yet again he wasn't wearing the socks I got him. I think I had it built up in my mind that he would realise I wanted him to wear them and do it to please me and that when he did it would show he wanted to please me and was willing to change even such a little thing to make me happy and that that would indicate he would change other little things and that if we gave things another shot then it would be different to our relationship before.

I am meeting G for lunch tomorrow (yummy sushi). His parents are visiting him this weekend and I didn't want to have to wait until next week to see him again. I would really like to have some sort of arrangement whereby we met up every week, I would like very much to know for sure every time we say goodbye that I will be seeing him again soon. A friend of mine was having an affair with a married man and only got to see him once a week. It was always on the same day and she has since told me how reassuring it was to know for sure that while other aspects of their relationship were in doubt (he wouldn't leave his wife, even though he claimed to be in love with my friend) that she knew she would be seeing him on that day every week. Sadly she is still in love with him even though she has a boyfriend and although she is not sleeping with the married man she is currently back to that one day a week meet up.

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