Thursday, 30 September 2010


The Tory chap I went on the rubbish date with over a week ago called me last night, I ignored the call. I saw no point in answering it as I don't want to start dating him and answering the phone would probably have led to him asking me to sort of event or to meet up with him and when confronted like that over the phone I am not always able to think up a good excuse not to, emails and texts are much easier as one can think about the reply first. Having him call did make me realise that I had given no thought to him since our date of over a week before, which threw into sharp contrast my frequent thoughts about Germanicus and his lack of contact.

We last met two weeks ago today and since then we have facebooked a couple of times and texted several times, although no contact at all since the weekend. I would really like him to get in touch and suggest we meet up as I have promised myself that I will not be one to suggest meeting up again. I suggested all of our previous meetings bar the first one (probably about 6 or 7 in all) and so it seems important for it to be him the next time. Sadly I will probably have a long time to wait! I have been jolly busy myself recently what with being back at uni and out with friends, but I do still find I have a lot more free time than I used to. I am filling this gap by working more and going to the gym. I only discovered going to the gym last year and now adore it!

In fact not only have I been the one arranging us meeting up but I even engineered my sleeping over at his flat a few weeks ago which I have previously failed to admit to anyone, even to this blog. It was a Saturday night and my flatmate was out of town, after going to see 'Tamara Drewe' at the cinema (which I enjoyed very much even though they mucked up the ending) I walked back to my flat and after stuffing some crucial overnight items in my bag I called G and pretended that I had locked my keys in my flat and that as my flatmate was away I was stuck... He was lovely and offered me his spare bed which I happily accepted. I went over to his flat where we stayed up stupidly late watching Star Trek and having a lovely time chatting. Nothing at all inappropriate happened but in the morning we did indulge in some fleeting cuddling in his bed before I left. I had really wanted to spend time with him and was also lonely in an unrelated to him fashion. It was really comforting to see him and to be in his flat again was nice. I had spent a huge amount of time there while we were together and it was so cosy to be there with him again. He didn't suspect that I was fibbing and even when mentioning the fact I stayed over to a few friends I also lied to them and pretended I really had lost my keys. I was also inspired to act out my little scheme because I knew that once uni started up again I would be busy and less desperate to see him and so allowed myself to indulge my wish to spend time with him as I anticipated that this wish would die down.

That wish has lessened. I still think about him an awful lot but not in the desperate way I felt before. I am now able to think of him a lot without mentioning his name constantly to others, without getting in touch with him for days on end and without feeling angry and hurt that he has not been in touch with me. I am learning to accept that perhaps he didn't feel as passionately about me as I did about him and that while I have had to work through lots of things since we split up he has found the adjustment to a single life much easier.

Saturday, 25 September 2010

I know from my statistics page that people are reading my blog but as yet nobody has commented. Please feel free to do so. I am also on twitter under loveandlit where I comment on general things and often on what I am reading.

Comfort reads and Richard Yates.

I have a stinking cold and so have been hunting out my most comforting reads. For some reason amusing diaries are tremendous favourites of mine in times like this and so good old Adrian Mole has been looked out, as has 'Diary of a Nobody' and Bridget Jones might even make an appearence. Nancy Mitford is another great standby and her 'Love in a Cold Climate' is my most re-read book of all. I just adore the way she writes and think her one of the most under-rated authors of all time. That title used to belong to Richard Yates. I discovered him about 7 years ago when my mother bought me 'Revolutionary Road'. I adored it and went on to read his full back catalogue.

Richard Yates specialised in writing of the bursting of the American bubble post World War II and the enemy in all of his novels was the dreaded surburbs. His use of words is incredible and there is never a superfluous word, his style is so sharp and precise. He was much lauded by fellow authors and by some critics during his life but his books did not sell and he was very hard up. He used a lot of his own or friends experiences in his books and the one criticism I have ever agreed with about his work is that there are many aspects from different books that are hugely similar.

'Revolutionary Road' was his first book and I believe his best, although 'Easter Parade' is rypically recognised as being his best work. The former was made into a film a couple of years ago by Sam Mendes and staring Kate Winslet and Leonardo Dicaprio and all of a sudden Yates' legacy altered beyond all recognition and his books were stocked everywhere and most of them were republished. I thought the film a fine adaptation his the book although I disliked the way the ending was handled and subtly altered. I do feel sad that Yates did not gain the profile he so sorely desearved and also craved during his lifetime for he was very much overlooked and had rather a horrid time of it. To anyone interested in reading about the man himself there exists a terrific biography of him by Blake Bailey called 'A Tragic Honesty'.

I think there is great skill in being able to match your mood with an appropriate book to suit it and as demonstrated above I find humour and light reading best for times of ill health and feeling sorry for oneself. Reading Richard Yates if hihgly inappropriate for such times! His books I rate very highly indeed but their tone is depressing and I keep them for periods of contemplation. I would certainly never read them at a specially fun time where I wanted my mood to be light and happy such as a holiday or Christmas. But for times when one is at a crossroads or feels like doing a lot of thinking about life, the world and other people they are very insightful for they do make one think. For me 'Revolutionary Road' always makes me consider the Paris of our imagination, and how most people are simply too scared to break free to ever try for their particular Paris. Also it makes me consider what it is to be female and how few men are really male. 'Easter Parade' is quite different and I find it darker for Yates wrote women terribly well and it follows one woman through her unsatisfying and ultimately empty life. It is a dark portrait of being alone, single and above all female.

Thursday, 23 September 2010

The killer question.

Now that term has started I have been meeting lots of lovely new men and to all of them I ask the same question: Do you read? and it's follow up questions about what exactly they read. The question of books is all important and, for me at least, a wonderful way of seperating out possibly interesting men from the less than interesting.

On Tuesday night I was out at a drinks thing and met several rather charming chaps. One in particular I found very attractive and so I lost no time in asking the deal breaker. Thankfully his initial answer was yes, he does indeed read. But sadly for us both when asked what work of literature he was currently enjoying he said he was reading a Dan Brown... A Dan Brown of all things! Good grief! I was horrified and not a little put off. He made back some of his lost ground by commenting on his liking of Joseph Conrad books, but since I don't much care for that author I wasn't overly impressed by that either, but at least his books are classics. Dan Brown, and to admit to it so casually!!!

I often find that people react oddly when asked about their reading habits, almost as though it were a school test on something they should have revised. They get all flustered and I strongly suspect many of them of fibbing about what their favourite book is as they often chose literature considered difficult. Once I was told that their favourite book was 'War and Peace' which at first delighted me and I launched into a discussion about it, only to find they had very strangely forgotten basic plot details!

I do hope I meet that attractive chap again even if he does read Dan Brown for he was rather nice. While out last night I was asked for my number by a rather sweet German student who like me adores swimming. I am not much interested in him but he was okay and if asked out for drinks I would probably accept. My fat and pompous friend has invited me over to his flat for port and cheese this afternoon. It certainly sounds like a friendly invitation but sadly he rather obviously fancies me. We know lots of the same people and also have some lectures together and whenever I leave to go home he springs up and walks me back. He is very nice indeed but desperately unattractive physically. It would really be much easier if he were just to ask me out so that I could say something kind about liking him as a friend so that we can put this awkwardness behind him. Were he not friends with so many people I know I might have gone on a few dates with him but were I to do that and then end it it might make things very uncomfortable to be around him and I see him at four lectures a week plus at least one social occasion weekly as well so friends it must be.

Looking forward to a cosy night in this evening. Three months ago tonight I split with Germanicus and I have decided to celebrate by eating my favourite junk foods, drinking a really good bottle of wine and watching the best television show of all time: Arrested Development.

Monday, 20 September 2010


I have just realised that the three month anniversary of me chucking Germanicus is not this Wednesday when I will be out with people but instead this Thursday for which I have no plans... maybe I should see him?!

A dating resolution.

There are some nights when I really miss Germnacius. I am successfully not reading anything more into this than that we were together for so long and that I am still getting used to his not being an almost constant physical presence in my life. Although sometimes I do wonder if my thinking about him so often and wanting to see him more often means something deeper. He is a lovely, wonderful person and i am still achingly fond of him and although he does have his annoying habits and all the things that used to annoy me so much are clearly still there he still compares very favourably to the other men that I am meeting and considering dating. To such an extent that although I do not mean to compare him with other boys it does happen.

When I was out at the weekend on that sort of a date but not quite I looked over at my companion and thought how uninteresting and dull he was compared to Germanicus. He didn't treat me the same way, talk about the same things or even look as good. I am not back at university after the long summer break and today in one of my classes the previously mentioned pompous fat chap sat next to me. He is great fun and jolly nice but as it suddenly occured to me that he might ask me out I felt a wave of mixed feelings. I am not sure I want to go on a date with him where as with Germanicus I was always sure I wanted to.

Oh I am just still adjusting to single life. Wednesday is the 23rd and it will be a whole three months since I ended things with G. I am out that night with friends for a proper dressed up night and intend to throw myself into the dating scene by flirting with lots of cute boys and maybe even getting asked out, even if only by the pompous chap, for I have made up my mind only to say no to date offers if I truly loath the person asking, I need the practice and after all one need not go out with them on a second date if the first goes badly.

In fact I hereby make the resolution to accept all date offers unless I detest the chap asking me.

Sunday, 19 September 2010

Rather a bust.

Yesterday's date was rather a bust. The Tory boy was more interesting than I thought he would be and turned out to have lots of lovely interests such as collecting vintage champers and being obsessed with Doctor Who, but despite my repeated attempts at book chat he just isn't good at talking about books. I found him to have the same problem as many of my acquaintence: he has read a good deal but when it comes to actually discussing the books he has read he falls way short. So there was a little Wodehousian talk (the only author I could find that we both adored and so I fell back on him a good deal) but mostly we chatted of other matters.

The date lasted into the evening but eventually I just became bored of him and called it a night. Like all good Tory boys he walked me home but I did not invite him in. He clearly likes me a lot and would like to see me again but I will not be agreeing to a proper date for three good reasons.

1. He expected me to pay half during our date! I do not like that sort of thing in the early dating stages and certainly not in the way he did it. He is well off and so it was not about economy but rather seemed to be part of his lets kind of go on a date but not entirely do so strategy to avoid him asking me out in any official way in case I turned him down. We went to three different wine bars and had we taken it in turns to buy drinks I would have objected far less but each time we had to split it. Such behaviour is messy and annoys me. While actually in a relationship I don't mind us taking it in turns to pay for things etc but when a boy asks you on a date I strongly believe he should pay the bill.

2. He is not charming and while I could accept that he was so graceless that on a couple of occasions he was practically insulting. He referred to us having known each other several years ago by exclaiming towards the end of the evening that he had had no idea I was so interesting and knew so much about whatever we were talking about. Ever so subtly screaming out that I had seemed jolly boring and not worth bothering about two years ago. Not a big deal but hardly appealing. He could have erased this by an easy compliment but instead just apologised a fews times which made it rather worse and just led to me remembering the incident.

3. He bored me. My one over-riding rule of dating is never to be with a man who bores me. To his credit Germanicus managed for years to avoid doing so, so it is possible. I find that some men have the ability to bore me within the space of an hour let alone a whole date and anyone who bores is never to be dated again.

So that particular boy is not going to be seen much of again except in group situations. Ironically I think he may have enjoyed our date rather more than I did for I have just been invited to his birthday party!

Friday, 17 September 2010

From old to new.

Met up with Germanicus last night. For the first time we hung out properly as friends, well except for him having his arm around me as we watched movies and my falling asleep on his chest.... So not quite black and white friends territory but still I think of it as good progress for there was no awkward talk of our previous relationship and we just had a relaxed time. I did have rather too much to drink which is perhaps why I kept dozing off event though it wasn't especially late, but I really enjoyed being with him. He seems to be discovering his uber geeky side now that he is single again and plans to start war gaming and playing 40k. I love geekiness but am jolly amused at his only getting into it after we split up. Clearly he is using it as a way to fill his time. What I am v keen on, however, is his holding some diplomacy evenings as I long to play it again. We have only played it once (a wonderful evening of red wine, diplomacy and geeky chatting) and I am desperate to repeat it. I very enarly nearly won against some very experienced players and it made me feel like Lord Vetinari!

Currently trying to compose a reply to that chap who asked me out over facebook. I wonder what I should call him... I am finding it very tricky to come up with names to use for my friends and acquaintences on here... I would call him Tory boy but I know so many of them that that just won't work. In fact I will not be naming him because this chap, nice though he is, is not going to become a fixture in this blog.

Gosh I do feel rather weird about going on a date, especially when I am unattracted to the boy... but I need the practice, we can talk about books which I will adore, and I can pretend that I thought he was asking me to hang out as a friend if neccessary. Actually that last is not entirely true for when I turn down a boy I always like to leave the door slightly open and before Germanicus my line always was 'I really like you but I don't feel I know you well enough... etc' which I found very successful in retaining their uinterest and yet also saying no gently. Now I think a good line would be 'I like you a lot but I have just come out of a long term relationship... etc'.

Oh well at least he reads books! He is particularly interested in classical literature, as in the classics (Livy, Suetonius, Tacitus etc) rather than classic books whichb suits me wonderfully as I am very into the classics, he also loves P.G. Wodehouse and so I anticipate lots of chummy chatting about Blandings and Jeeves and Wooster.

Thursday, 16 September 2010

Dating offers.

Is it wrong to go on a date when you have zero interest in the other person? Well zero interest is not quite true; he is really nice and actually quite interesting but it is true that I am not the least bit attracted to him... I plan to accept, it has been too long since I went on a date and we are bound to have some good chat about books. We used to vaguely know each other in a crowd and then I bumped into him again last week after not seeing him for a couple of years. Perhaps because I am now single he seemed a lot more interested in me than I remembered and we had a pretty good time talking about the P.G. Wodehouse, classic literature and graphic novels and their big screen adaptations. He then added me on facebook and today, a week after reconnecting with me, I got a long message asking me if I were free on Saturday afternoon to wander and go to a yummy sounding wine bar.

Admittedly Saturday afternoon is not a usual sort of date time and he did not exactly imply in his message that it is a date but that is certainly what he wants it to evolve into. I found his message jolly sweet although  he seemed to be trying far too hard to write in the manner of a Wodehouse novel in order to impress me. Gosh it is rather exciting to be asked out again after being in a relationship for so long, especially as it sort of happened yesterday as well! A lovely pompous fat chap sort of asked me out yesterday afternoon and was going to later on get my number but his friends were with him later on and he chickened out on getting my number. He added me on facebook last night though so I do hope he asks again!

What I would love is to do lots and lots of dating of lots of boys, stay with none of them for too long and just have a huge amount of fun. Finding another longterm boyfriend is not at the top of my agenda, I plan to have a wonderfully frivilous and decadently exciting single life first!

Sunday, 5 September 2010

Far from the madding crowd.

'Far From the Madding Crowd' by Thomas Hardy inspired the wonderful graphic novel 'Tamara Drewe' which is being released this week and I am overwhelmed with eagerness to see it. The graphic novel (I really quite like still calling them comics but the sort of comic I read always seems to be referred to as a graphic novel these days) is by Posy Simmonds and is absolutely smashingly good. Vaguely based on the Hardy book which I have not read (not a fan of his) it tells the tale of Tamara Drewe's return to her girlhood village following a nose job and her successes as a hack journalist. It is tremendously funny and frightfully middle-class, indeed the latter characteristic is a common theme throughout Simmonds' work which is perhaps why I find her so amusing an author. 'Tamara Drewe' is Simmonds' best work, though 'Gemma Bovary' (inspired by Flaubert's Madame) is also jolly good.

The film stars Gemma Arterton who also played Hardy's Tess from 'Tess of the d'Urbervilles' in a BBC adaptation a few years ago. She seems like the perfect choice for Drewe, as does Roger Allam as Nicholas Hardiment, but I remain unconvinced by the choice of Tamsin Grieg as Hardiment's wife as in the comic book she was most plump and that weight fit the character to such an extent that having her on screen as thin literally seems to detract something from Beth Hardiman. I plan to see it this Friday after it's Thursday release and am so looking forward to it! 

For those who wish to see the trailer:

The graphic novel was originally serialised in the Guardian newspaper just as 'Bridget Jones' first appeared in installments in the Independant. I wish newspapers still serialise books but the only example I can think of is '44 Scotland Street' by Alexander McCall Smith which was in the Scotsman, and sadly I do not enjoy his work. When his books first started appearing I bought 'The No.1 Ladies Detective Agency' and disliked it so much that I didn't get much beyond the first chapter. 'The Diary of a Nobody' which I mentioned in my last entry also first appeared in serial form back in the glorious days of Punch magazine. I do so wish Punch was still in existence for I have often thought I would adore it.

Graphic novels get a funny wrap from society in general but I have long been a fan. I am not at all into what I refer to as superhero comics but adore the work of Daniel Clowes who wrote 'Ghost World' (also an excellent film) and 'Ice Haven', Alan Moore who wrote 'Watchmen' and 'V for Vendetta' (both truly dreadful films) and 'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' (a horrendously bad film). I think most other girls are put off reading them due to the emphasis on superheros but they really should give them a second look. Posy Simmonds' work is particularly easy to get into as her books feel like pure books due to the large amount of text she incorporates. I very much enjoyed seeing 'Scott Pilgrim vs the World' last week and am rather interested in comparing the film to the graphic novels of the same name which  good friend assures me are much better than the big screen version.

Saturday, 4 September 2010

Bonjour bonheur.

Having rather a jolly time of it today which is due in no small part to having started a new book. Technically it is not new but one I am rereading but I am always so desolate without a book in my hand that being plunged back into one is perfectly heavenly. I am reading 'Bonjour Tristesse' by Francoise Sagan which is a smash book about a young French girl named Cecile and her interventions in the love life of her charismatic and decadent playboy father. It is a wonderful little novella and Sagan was but a mere 18 years of age when she published the book which is quite extraordinary when one considers the complex nature of the character development. The voice of the narrator and main character Cecile, who is the same age as the author when it was written, is marvelously accurate and it is solely on that head that one might guess Sagan to have been so young a literary queen.

I also continue with my Blandings novels but as they really are very similar and all in the same style one also needs at least one other book on the go. Indeed I mostly reserve my P.G Wodehouses to be read with meals and to take around with me in the bag for spot of reading on trains and so on. One needs to very careful with them though for a often find myself giggling aloud as I read them and have attracted some interested looks!

Not only an I great devourer of the written word but I adore and am utterly and completely dependant on audiobooks. Currently my ears are enjoying 'Diary of a Nobody' by the bros Grossmith. It is one of my all time favourite books and I just can't listen to it too often. I have the Martin Jarvis version on my ipod and he is the perfect compliment to Pooter. I was first introduced to the brilliant and second to none audiobook work of Jarvis as a child when I heard his versions of the 'Just William' books which incidentally I think are some of the very best childrens books ever, they are right up there with 'The Wind in the Willows', 'Winnie the Pooh' and my personal favourite 'The Hobbit'. Jarvis is masterful at humour in his voice acting and I can't recommend him strongly enough. Selecting audiobooks to listen to is a fine art for one is not merely looking for a ideal book but a book ideal for listening to (they are very much not one and the same, I once owned 'The Wings of the Dove' as audio and it was truly dreadful) and also the perfect narrator for that work. I tend to avoid dramatisations as I find they have changed lots of things about the book to made it right for dramatisation and almost always severely abridged it, although an exception to that rule is the terrific BBC dramatisation of 'Lord of the Rings' which includes lots of splendid music written specially for Middle Earth.

I have a huge collection of audiobooks and my hot tips are 'Paul Temple' - but only the Peter Coke versions which are utterly splendid, Agatha Christie Poirot or Miss Marple books - Hugh Fraser and Joan Hickson versions are particularly good and Terry Pratchett novels - only the Tony Robinson versions. I normally always go for the unabridged version and my one exception to that rule is for the Tony Robinson Terry Prachett audiobooks. They are heavily abridged but it is skillfully done and Tony Robinson is such a perfect choice as the voices of the characters that it is more than made up for. He is to the Discworld what Martin Jarvis is to 'Just William'.

Friday, 3 September 2010

Encounters with the past - Antonia Minor

After my earlier entry today I found myself feeling so sad that I decided on the spur of the moment to go home and see my family. Wonderful decision and I am currently loving being at home and cooked for! It proved to be an even better idea after a littler encounter I had on the way...

I went into Waterstones on my way to the train station as I wanted to find out if they had any of Emile Zola's 20 novel magnum opus ' Les Rougon-Macquart' which I am desperate to get my hands on (I have since ordered the first two in the series from Amazon marketplace as Waterstones had none of them!). Who did I spot as soon as I had walked in the door but Germanicus' mother! (As I have called him Germanicus I shall call her Antonia Minor, Antonia for short as that was his mother in real life, I particularly like the idea as in 'I, Claudius' she was rather horrid. To be fair G's mother is not horrid but was not terribly good to me and jolly cold and we were not kindred spirits) I was horrified and my knees immediately began to shake (my body's typical reaction to my old public speaking and competition days so it was a bit of an odd reaction in the circumstances). She was facing a bookcase by the door and I was so taken aback and nervous that I made for another bookshelf nearby and tried to compose myself (and stop my hands shaking, for my knees seemed to be passing on tips to them) by flicking through Tony Blair's memoirs. I moved on to read the blurb of a recently published and very interesting sounding book about a Nazi dentist as written by his grandson or son. By this time I was in control and ready to face her and so I turned back to the shelve she had been browsing to find her gone. I thought she must just be in another section and so after arranging my skirt and smoothing my hair into position I slowly walked round the whole shop to find her absent.

We had been standing very close together. I could genuinely have not seen her due to the way the shop was laid out, but it is highly unlikely that she missed spotting me. I am convinced she saw me and to avoid an awkward hello, she left intentionally. 

I texted Germanicus and asked if it was possible that I had just missed Antonia in Waterstones (his parents life a long distance away and so are only around when they visit him). He said she was in town and so I might have done. I replied that she I had seen her and before I got the chance to say hello she had gone, and that I thought she might have been avoiding me on purpose. I was really hurt by her behaviour. I was her only child's love interest for over 3 years and she couldn't even bring herself to say hello and make a little small talk. He must have asked her for a while later I got a one line text telling me that Antonia had not seen me and that if she had she would have said hello. I don't believe her, though I am sure he does. While I love my parents I can see lots of their faults and along with loving them we have the odd disagreement and so on, as healthy relationships do. He has always thought his parents perfect in every way so if she told him she didn't see me he won't even question it or wonder if she was lying.

I am so sad about it because it acts as a reinforcement of the fact that the life G and I built together filled with the things we did together, our habits and routines formed over such a long time, the friends we met through each other and our two different families and so on, that it is all over. We have both gone back to having seperate lives. As Will spoke of in 'About a Boy', people are all islands, we are all alone, and only sometimes linked to other islands. I am finding it a big adjustment being my own island again but it is over 10 weeks now and things are without a doubt looking up. Roll on term time!

Grey areas.

Last night was really weird. We started off in a vaguely argumentative mood, or to be honest I did and he was cheery, then as dinner progressed things were lovely which led to me getting all sad thinking about what might have been. After that I didn't feel like sitting through a movie and so we went to my flat and sat chatting for hours. We got onto the subject of our breaking up repeatedly and we both got sad. By later on that evening I was desperate for him to kiss me as that sort of felt like it would magically solve everything that had happened but luckily he didn't, although at the time I wished he would. We sat really close on the couch but nothing happened bar a brief hug and then in a wild moment that I am trying to forget I sort of invited him to stay over... he was really sleepy and I did add just as friends, but I still regret it, thankfully he rejected my offer and left. Afterwards I cried for a long time and then spend a sleepless night thinking about him and about us, but not coming to any conclusions.

I know it was for the best that nothing happened but I feel ghastly today and miss him so much. But I must try and focus on what is best in the long run and getting back with Germanicus is not what is best. And earlier in the evening lots of his old habits resurfaced and annoyed me just like they used to, and he talked about all the same sort of things he always did, he was not very interested in what I had been doing and wanted to talk about himself all the time etc.

Over our current situation he is being very passive which is agrivating. In answer to several questions from me he freely admitted he still didn't think our splitting up was for the best, he referred to me as wonderful and said he didn't want to date anyone but me. And yet even though I intentionally sat v close to him he didn't try and kiss me, he didn't open up a 'i love you lets give it another shot' chat and yet he made it clear in so many ways that he wants us to be together again. I hate that passivity. If he wants me back he should do something about it and if he doesn't then he shouldn't throw out such hints. In the earlier portion of the evening I said that now we are learning to be friends we must not have grey areas of him saying things like that and trying to hold my hand etc, and although I too allowed lots of greyness later on I think my original plan of just black and white was better and intend to work hard at it now.

I really want us to be friends as I can't bare for him not to be in my life. But it will be unfair on him as well as me if I allow myself to try and encourage him to make a play fopr me again, for in all honesty that is what I was doing. I have been very hurt at the way in which he has so easily got on with his life after we split up but as I have decided that the split is for the best I must stick with it and not allow myself to give in to the loneliness and sadness of it by letting anything happen with him. It would spoil any chance of our becoming and remaining friends.

Thursday, 2 September 2010

Dinner and a movie.

I am meeting Germanicus later for dinner and a movie. Gosh it does rather sound like a date when one puts it like that but I fully intend to meet purely as friends. I feel a bit nervous about it but mostly just calm and I have put a lot of effort into putting together an outfit and using makeup that looks casual but terrific at the same time. It will be lovely to hang out and talk to him again, I still love talking to him.

Started  'Pigeon Pie' by Nancy Mitford but it is rubbish! I was so shocked as I adore all her other books but this one stinks! It is full of characters that appear in her later books in a better written form and this totally spoils it for me. Currently deciding which book to read next and so am continuing with some lovely Blandings books as I do so.

Went to see Scott Pilgrim vs the World yesterday and thought it jolly good. Loved all the in referrences to American tv shows, comics and video games, particularly the Seineld jokes.

Going to have a big glass of wine with my book in preparation for tonight, perhaps I am a bit more nervous than I care to admit!