Partnership.

Two girls I knew as children and who are about my age are married. Just heard about the second one this morning. I find this jolly interesting a vague sort of gosh aren't they young to be making such a huge commitment, they will will be missing out on so many things now way but also in an envious they have found someone who loves them so much they married them way.

I don't want to get married so young, although I would certainly love to meet the man I want to marry one day, so I am not jealous of them for actually getting married. But I do envy them the being with someone who loves them so much and who they love so much.

I think as humans we are all lonely and spend a lot of time, effort and money in trying to escape that fact. Richard Yates, who was terribly lonely and wrote about it so brilliantly, said that "Most human beings are inescapably alone, and therein lies their tragedy". I think he was right.


Being home over Christmas I have been jolly bored and also there have been the odd times, typical of family life, where there are cross words and fractious moments. During these times I have longed to have someone who was always on my side and who I could rely on to be there for me and to understand. A partner to go through life with. I think deep down that is what everyone wants, and some people find, and when it boils down to it is the reason people get married, they wish to go through their life with another person to share it with.


Tomorrow is the last day of 2010 and I have been giving a lot of thought to my resolutions. Typically I want all the usual things: good grades at uni, to go to the gym and eat healthily all year long rather than Bridget Jones style in fits and spurts, and to date more. I really need to come up with a proper plan to meet the sort of men I want to date rather than my current situation of meeting men who many want to date me but who I find unattractive!